The Incomprehensible Meets the Inevitable
Linda Shared this Poem with Gangaji
On October 21, 2019
One night as I waited for sleep to overtake me, an unexpected and fierce blaze of fear rushed through my body.
I chose to remain perfectly still and open. Wider … wider .. ever wider.
Still.
I saw how terrified I was of being alone.
The mind was running like a train out of control
headed for hell.
Instead of picking up a book or beginning a chant,
Something in me wanted to stop. Was ready to stop.
Stop the countless efforts to avoid and postpone turning toward this fear.
So, I gave my attention to the mind with complete acceptance,
“It’s fine. Let yourself run as fast and hard as you can.
Roam as far and wide as you need.
For your travels, take with you this one question, “Who am I?
And when you return, let me know what you find.”
Then, I let myself fully experience what seemed like
endless loneliness.
As unexpectedly as the fear had arisen,
Pure joy like nothing before, shining …
Its Light moving effortlessly
through every ounce and particle
of disbelief that I could ever be free.
In the midst of sudden surprise
I find myself … absorbed in ever-deepening Joy.
Something incomprehensible …
The inevitable comes to pass.
A thought appeared
and I recognized my old and tattered friend,
“Ahhh you have returned. What did you find?”
I was stunned as I watched the mind bow its head low in respect for Me,
respect for its search to find the answer.
The mind spoke with tender reverence …
“I visited countless temples, mosques, and sacred places of every kind …
some built on holy ground, some nothing more than a mud hut.
I sat with great beings of many esteemed traditions,
spent thousands of hours meditating and chanting,
reading and studying sacred scriptures ancient and new,
and basking in the poetry of lovers of God.
I pierced the mysteries of numerous religions
while gathering beliefs and concepts that comforted me
when I was weary and afraid.”
Then, together we reviewed the life we had lived,
turning over one by one the stones of everything I believed to be true and concepts I held so dear.
In humble repose, the mind continued.
“In all my travels, the One I found
over and over again …
… was You.
You were always there … always with me. How obvious! So simple!
My glimpses of Truth were glimpses of You.
So, I have come to offer you my answer. Who Am I? …
I am You!”
Then, I and the mind, spiraling in flames of pure Love became One,
Love’s fire leaving nothing to cling to …
“I”
dissolved
into indescribable
Silence.
